Being intimately experienced with PTSD/Depression and suicidal ideation, I’ve been asked a few times what I believe 1st responder emergency services organizations should be doing to address their employees mental health in an effort to address the the growing number of 1st responder suicides. Below is what I believe should happen: 1. acknowledge that mental…

Provided content to be included in this upcoming release. Story provided is titled “To the Brink and Back With My Good Friend Ego”

When you have PTSD and depression there is nothing more scary then being awake and alone with your thoughts in the still and darkness of the night. The darkness acts like a blindfold obscuring your view of all those worldly things that would keep you grounded and in the here and now. Your mind runs…

Submitted essay for inclusion in the non-fiction anthology titled “Not Cancelled” by Wintertickle Press. ESSAY 2020 started out just like 2019 did for me, full of anger with everybody and everything and with a collection of negative beliefs about everybody, everything, society, and more specifically, the moral character of the collective society I am part…

Given the circumstances that were absolutely beyond my control, I did my absolute best in a situation that was a no-win situation, at an emergency incident that was chaotic and caused by somebody else’s morally wrong decision and senseless actions. That decision ultimately, very tragically, very traumatically, in a very graphic and gruesome way, took…

I, like so many 1st responders have been burdened, or gifted depending on your perspective, with PTSD and depression from a career of firefighting. I have been challenged to navigate this whole PTSD recovery process and have had some success. There are still many areas and aspects that I need to work on and address…

1. Some of the negative consequences of having PTSD are proving to be quite beneficial during this pandemic. Who knew that having PTSD was a good thing? 2. My PTSD symptom of hypervigilence actually helps keep me safe when doing a necessary grocery shop because I see everybody that is moving around me and everything…

Therapy for PTSD isn’t just about dealing with traumatic memories but also fixing the person that has been changed emotionally and cognitively by the exposure to traumatic experiences. To do this requires one to actively engage in self-reflection, a difficult and many times extremely painful exercise. This self-reflection typically leads to a greater awareness of…

So my first visit with my psychotherapist, how did it go? It was amazing! I was early, very early, as I always am. I sat in the waiting room looking around at all the signs, posters and books dealing with trauma, PTSD, support systems and the like. In that 20 minutes while I sat there…

PTSD is a mental health challenge that plagues many 1st responders and I was no different. 27 years of firefighting had left me battling it and depression burdening me with many of the common problematic symptoms that tend to come along with PTSD. There were intrusive symptoms, avoidance symptoms, alterations in cognition and mood and…